Organizing & Marriage

Learn Each Other’s Organizing Styles: Yes, everyone has an organizing style, even if you don’t know exactly what it is! If you are familiar with the four learning styles, start there. They are Visual (learn by seeing), Auditory (learn by hearing/listening), Kinesthetic (learn by doing), and Tactile (learn by touching). Often times, couples have very different organizing styles, making it difficult to set up and maintain shared organizing systems. Give some thought to the organizing style of each person using the system so that it makes sense to both users.

Reach Compromise on Shared Systems: If the organizing system you are creating is to be a shared system, you must give consideration both users. Failing to consider both users is a common mistake and often causes the system to fall apart. So, do yourself and your partner a favor – communicate! Spend the time brainstorming how each person plans to use the system, and create a compromise that makes the most sense. The solution may be built around the most common user, or a combination of both users. This may take some extra effort, but usually results in a system that is maintained more effectively.

Tolerance for Clutter: Different people have different levels of tolerance for clutter. Some are “outies,” meaning that they like the exposed areas like counter tops, to be clear, but can tolerate clutter in hidden zones, like closets, drawers, closets, etc. They just want their outward appearance to look organized and they don’t want to see the clutter. Others are “innies,” meaning that the clutter can pile up on exposed surfaces, but their drawers, closets, and filing cabinets are pretty well organized. They are “pilers,” leaving clutter out for all to see, but keep their private, inner spaces orderly. If an “innie” and an “outie” live together, there is often a big disconnect in the way they tolerate and handle clutter.

Leave Judgment Out: I know it’s hard but you really need to make a conscious effort to approach your partner in a non-judgmental manner. Otherwise, your partner will just become defensive, and shut down to any creative solutions that could be reached. Try to approach your organizing projects with a sense of humor. If your partner has difficulty with setting up and maintaining organizing systems realize that organizing is a skill and can be taught. Show some empathy and be patient as you try to find each other’s organizing strengths and overcome weaknesses.

Travelling and Stress

From experience, I know there is some stress when planning a trip on your own. What are the hotels, or the hostels, (as in our case) like? Will you be disappointed? Are they in a good area? Are they clean? Are they central to what you want to do? Are they close to the metro stations? Do they offer breakfast? Do you have to take your own linen and towels? (This is sometimes a requirement in some hostels). Are the rooms ensuite? Do they have WiFi and internet access? What are check-in and check-out times? Do they have a custodian on site 24/7? Do they offer laundry facilities? How many are in a room and are they same sex rooms or mixed gender? Do they take Visa or cash only? A lot of these concerns will apply when booking hotels too, particularly lower budget ones and especially when travelling internationally. And we had to make a decision about how long we were going to stay in each place and where we wanted to visit in our limited time.

To try and avoid problems, we thoroughly researched each hostel or hotel, the area, where the attractions were and the metro stations and read all the reviews. Reviews were difficult because there was such a variety of opinions so we went with the majority. We were very fortunate that in all of the places we stayed, they were all decent, fitting most of our criteria. There were some that were better than others but we considered ourselves lucky in the ones we chose. And only once did we end up with a man in the room with us and that was quickly taken care of with no problems.

What’s Your Organizing Style?

Before you begin organizing, it can be useful to know how you engage with the world.  That may sound odd, but it is an important factor.  There are basically four modes – people, things, data and ideas.  Your preference will determine an organizing style that can work for you.

If you enjoy People, then it will help to get support or help from people to get organized.  In fact, it may be more difficult for you to get organized and stay engaged with the process unless there is social interaction.  This could be working with a professional organizer, a friend or family member or a clutter buddy.

If you primarily enjoy working with Things, then you will probably like installing shelves or creating space suited for storage.  You’ll approach organizing by how it looks and functions.  Seeing it as a project with a beginning and an end product, an organized space, will be a motivator for you.

If you like Data, then it will probably be easy for you to organize papers and electronic files by categories.  Paper probably doesn’t scare you and it may be easier for you to sort and purge.

If you like working with Ideas, then themes and meaning behind the organizing will likely be important to you.  You will need the big picture as you set your goal for organizing and need to remind yourself of that when the organizing becomes tedious.

As you consider these four modes, you may feel you are strong in more than one of these.  Even so, there will be one that predominates.  You can test yourself by asking if you had a choice of what to do right now, which one would you engage with?

Determine Your Organizing Style

There are several ways to organize just about everything. The trick is to find the way that will work for YOU. It is VERY important that when I step away from your project YOU can find things. (That’s not to say I can’t help with maintenance, I can, but that’s the question for next time.)

There are many factors that go into determining your organizing style. I do this by getting to know you very well. How you work and how you live.
Almost all organizing projects start with sorting. During the sorting process I will ask you A LOT of questions. I need to learn what, when, how, where and why you do what you do. We will talk about what works and what doesn’t. We will talk about why certain things work and others don’t.

You are either right-handed or left-handed. It makes a difference.

You might be a visual person. You might be an analytical person. You are probably more right-brained or left-brained.
You might be creative. You might be a very logical thinker. You might be all over the place.

None of these are wrong. They’re just different.
Maybe you’re at your best early in the morning. Maybe you can’t even think about work until you’ve had a couple of cups of coffee. If we’re deciding how best to organize your office, your day, your emails, your papers or your desk, it is important to know when you’re at your best.

Are you the type of person who likes to know what you’re doing tomorrow before you leave the office or do you like to plan your day when you come in in the morning?

The reason all of these things are important is because to remain organized the systems we put in place will need to become habits. If they go against who you are they will never become habits. It’s my job to find what will work for you. With systems that fit your style, you will develop habits that stick with you. They will fit and feel right.

Getting Stuffed in Turkey – A Travel Journal

Days prior to departure, I as engulfed in fear this trip wouldn’t go. The volcanic ash cloud parked over Europe was heading straight for Istanbul. April 22, I was never so happy to board an airplane along with 44 wonderful adventurers of our group tour in tow. Turkish Airlines revamped it’s entire fleet now vying to rank #3 of all European carriers. Economy class provided the new sliding seats to maximize legroom, amenities kits, seatback blockbuster on-demand movies and the freshest airline meals I’ve ever had.

Istanbul, located in both Asia and Europe is the only city that straddles two continents with a thrilling cultural mosaic blending the old with the new. Our guide Gigi was assigned to fly with us 24/7 throughout the entire tour of this magnificent country. From day one, she was so outstanding I doubled her anticipated tip. On a city tour, we covered all major sites with the frenetic energy of whirling dervishes. It included the Blue Mosque, Haggia Sophia, Hippodrome and Topaki Palace, home to sultans, harems and eunuchs I stood in awe there at the 87 carat Spoonmaker’s Diamond that was found discarded in trash and traded for 3 spoons. Later we got lost in the labyrinth of the 4300 shops of the Grand Bazaar. The chronic pleas from vendors can assault one’s senses if you don’t know how to bounce it off.

I pretended to be a deaf mute strolling zen-like with a smile, My greatest treasure was a butter leather “Prada” or should I say “Prado” bag for $30. At night, many experienced their first authentic Turkish Bath at a 300 year old hamman which can be totally confusing if you don’t know the procedure and no one speaks English. First you get naked in a steam room and are pounded like a piece of meat on a warm marble slab. Then they loofa off several epidermal layers followed by tons of soapy suds and an oil massage. It ends with torrents of water. I felt I was being water-boarded and wanted to “spill my secrets” but left squeaky clean as I ever felt in my life. The younger group participants partied late into the night Istanbul never sleeps.

Purse Organizer Style

Just think how many times you have been walking down the street, maybe by yourself or maybe with your wife or girlfriend. Think about how many times you have seen her or any other woman fiddling inside her handbag or purse searching for some specific item, maybe the keys of the car or the keys of the apartment. This is such a common situation and happens to almost every woman on earth.

The great news is that now something called the purse organizer has been invented. Most women know about the existence of such accessories which help them to categorize and organize their belongings inside a purse. They are great because they help women not loose time searching for their keys or their make up. This is the reason why these purse organizers have become so popular lately. In fact they have become so popular that most women now have both items: on one hand they still keep having handbags and on the other side they also have purse organizer. I think that they both satisfy two different needs and this is the reason why they compliment each other so well. They are both really nice and appealing to wear, and one of them even helps organize women’s stuff in a more orderly fashion. But it is important for women who use a purse organizer to keep it well organized, or things will mess up pretty fast inside the purse, and we would be back to square one, where trying to find a specific item becomes an odyssey.

Get a Financial Loan Or a Horse to Borrow

Buying a horse is a moment of great excitement for any horse lover. Horses can be purchased to pamper them as a pet or even for commercial purposes such as for racing or soothing long riding. Considering the price paid for horses are exorbitant, many people just refrain themselves from buying one. However changing market trends and growth of several financing options has increased many lending institutions ability to lend loans to borrowers who want to purchase a horse.

Similar to a house loan, a car loan or even a mortgage loan, you can now opt for a horse loan to buy a horse for yourself. Be it a pony or a grown up horse, you can simply apply for a loan a horse and fulfill your dream of owning one, at no initial costs.Generally owners loan there horses at a point when they are unable to manage them. Hence they loan their horses to interested parties, who can pay for the horse’ expenses like the stable cost, the food, vaccination etc. There are two ways you can get a horse; borrower one or buy one.

One noteworthy aspect of borrowing a loaner horse is that the ownership of the animal remains with the original owner instead of a borrower. The loan agreement is signed for a limited period, consented by both parties. During this period the borrower has to expense the living of the horse and can use it for commercial or personal purposes. After the duration of the bond gets over, the lender or original owner will retain the ownership of the horse. This is a good option if you don’t have an interest in fully owning a horse for it’s lifetime.

If you are interested in buying a horse instead of borrowing or sharing it with someone, you can obtain financing from companies that offer horse loans. Since it is quite an investment and most people cannot afford to pay the lump sum, they get the horse financed. The institutions offering horse loans can lend you anything from $1,000 to $30,000 and the repayment duration could last from 3 to 25 years.

Getting the loan approved for buying an animal is actually a cakewalk like any other loan as most creditors are only concerned with the interest amount and the repayment of the loan. They will not even interfere with the usage of the loan amount, if it loan is applied as a personal loan, installment loan, second mortgage loan, or no-collateral loan. You can even get cash advance loans that are 7 to 10 times larger than your monthly net-pay. Finding the lenders that offer loans to buy horses is not hard, they are usually found on a website grouping page, whereas all the lenders you actually pay to be listed as horse loan lenders.

If unsure whether or not buying a horse is the best option, maybe horse sharing is the more feasible option. Sharing would require you to pay for the horse’s maintenance in partnership with the owner and would allow you, your friends, and family to enjoy rides on the horse along with other horse related activities. What ever you choose to do, either way, make sure it is in both your and the horse’s best interest.